The Chronicles Of…

From Evie:

I had a great day today with Grandpa. We went for walks, had apricot chicken for lunch, and I did a massive sloppy poo in the afternoon (I love dropping those ones on Grandpa!).

Tonight dad tried to feed me dinner but he doesn’t realise that I can feed my damn self <distant voice from background> “Damn. Evie who taught you to speak like that?” Sorry Dad. Anyway I’m a big girl now I can feed myself. I’m a bit slow at it, and I often miss my mouth, so dad does come in handy when I’m getting hungry and impatient. dad doesn’t seem to realise that food time is not all about eating… there’s so much more to appreciate… you need to engage all the senses to get the full experience. That’s why I put the food in my hair, in my eyes, up my nose, and rub it through my clothes. I try to make dad appreciate it by flicking the food on him, but he’s just thinking about “cleaning up” and his “precious” clothes… Adults are so one dimensional! It’s not a good meal until you tasted and worn your food.

Anyway, bath time now.

by-yeeee.

Being a leisurely Sunday with no youth group on, I decided to take a newspaper with me to the can and do a bit of reading under the impression that the can might be a place conducive for that sort of thing… but it’s terrible!

I don’t know how people read on the can… The cold freckle and the hard plastic impression on the my bum cheeks was enough to finish me off… No sir. Reading is for the lounge, the hammock or the comfy chair. The lou reading for me.

Incidently, how many words are there for anus? Freckle, Jaxi, Date, Bunghole, Clacker…?

Or, even, how many words are there for toilet? Lou, Can, Dunny…?

I don’t have a twitter… so here’s the next closest thing i have to a tweet:

I’m a fat arse. 107kg!

I’m starting a new series of blogs and I’m encouraging everybody to get in on the action! It’s called (wait for it…) “You’re that guy!”

That’s right campers! “You’re that guy” is about trying to box people into narrow minded stereo types. Here’s how it works: all you have to do is notice a trait, or common thread that vaguely links certain types of personalities or behaviours and then say “Oh, you’re that guy who has a bottle opener key ring…”

That’s it! So simple. You don’t have to make any value judgements, just pick it out and label it.

Here’s a couple to start us off:

• Oh, you’re that guy who wears skinny jeans…
• Oh, you’re that guy who spells the abbreviated ‘you are’ as ‘your’…
• Oh, you’re that guy who has an apple mac T-shirt…

See how fun it is! Give it a go!

I bet Pete’s got some good ones (eg. Oh, you’re that guy who dares me to pepper spray you…)

look forward to hearing from you.

I’ve got right into Arj barker ever since I saw him do this piece at the comedy gala festival in Melbourne last year.

I’m still laughing!

And this one from this year

Drove past a fashion shop in Earlwood the other day called “Wot’z Hot“… and I’ve gotta ask: why bother with an apostrophe when there is obviously no concern for correct spelling anywhere else in the title?

Thankyou. that is all.

James and I went to the movies last night and saw District 9.

It’s an Alien flick but it’s not like any alien flick you’ve seen! It really is different and also brilliant! What I particularly like was the subtle satire of all the big american end of the world alien movies like independence day etc… An alien space craft that looks very similar to that of independence day settles not over Washington or New York, but over Johannesburg South Africa… And the aliens, far from being hostile overlords, are vulnerable refugees (which is why I guess they picked the continent of Africa…)

I think there are some intentional parallels drawn with the apartheid in SA and some of the current refugee issues on that continent, certainly there’s a stab at the Nigerian scammers.

It’s a bit “Hot Fuzz” is structure, with a slower moving first half and then some very fast moving bloody action for the second. It’s bloody, but not too hard to handle… a few bodies exploding and the occasional head and limb torn off… you know, Shaun of the Dead style.

Anyway, I liked it. Worth the money to see at the cinema or at least a must DVD rental.

So i’ve set myself a challenge: To buy all 7 of the Harry Potter books in hard cover for under $70.00 AUD.

Which basically means I have to hunt them down from second hand shops, which is good fun.

I just bought the first one (the philosophers stone) for $8.50 the other day, so I’m off and racing. $61.50 left in the budget.

If you see some, let me know.

Here’s the list of Harry Potter books in order:

1. Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone
2. Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets
3. Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
4. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
5. Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
6. Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince
7. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

It’s been a busy week, well, actually busy weeks. I really try hard not to be busy but sometimes it just is… This week was a no day-off week as well, so I’m a bit tired… but feeling good now.

We’ve been having good friends over every week for dinner at our place after youth group and it’s good wind down time. And now I’m watching the ashes and letting my mind slip away into sleep mode.

Yeah you read it here first.

I’m contemplating reading through all the Harry Potter books in the next 2 weeks…